Housefly, tapping my window like morse code at dawn.
I fantasise about a life where I spend my whole day working on the property. week after week I attend to every detail, weeding everything, planting everything, planning, cleaning, building, a verdant garden to nourish us all. Instead I spend an hour a week, tops, and dig half a hole. I wish only to grow a zucchini this year. Everything else is a bonus. I try to squash the false belief that I will garden us through economic insecurity - not because it isn’t possible, though it isn’t, but because it’s looking to my own strength as provider.
I see myself spreading out over different tasks, which suits my fleeting attention, but I perhaps should try some sustained work one day this week. I’ll be taking some time out on thursday to check out a potential new car - I’ll drive it to the mechanics and get a prepurchase inspection, and drive it past our house and rev it so Erin can hear and give her opinion.
Still Lord of the Rings. I’ve come across some good shorter pieces online but they’ve been transient. Really enjoying, as always, the missives from Craig Mod, who’s running another pop up newsletter